Paradise Lost Modern Text

 

Text		tl;dr
OF MAN’S first disobedience, and the fruit		Hey there Muse, can you tell me about Man's first Sin? It had something to do with that fruit, right?
Of that forbidden tree whose mortal taste		I know it was forbidden, but in Adam and Eve's case it was for-biting.
Brought death into the World, and all our woe,		It brought the possibility of sin and death to our world, it was a rotten apple!
With loss of Eden, till one greater Man		It made our Paradise Lost (Hey...that's the title of this thing!), until Jesus Christ came to the rescue
Restore us, and regain the blissful Seat,	5	To help us get better.
Sing, Heavenly Muse, that, on the secret top		So Muse, let me have some inspiration, like you gave
Of Oreb, or of Sinai, didst inspire		Moses inspiration. Give me whatever you gave him.
That Shepherd who first taught the chosen seed		Moses was a pretty cool guy, he taught a lot of people
In the beginning how the heavens and earth		And I want to do the same.
Rose out of Chaos: or, if Sion hill	10
Delight thee more, and Siloa’s brook that flowed
Fast by the oracle of God, I thence
Invoke thy aid to my adventrous song,		I need your help in creating this epic
That with no middle flight intends to soar
Above the Aonian mount, while it pursues	15
Things unattempted yet in prose or rhyme.		I want to create something that has never been done before
And chiefly Thou, O Spirit, that dost prefer		And I want to learn from you
Before all temples the upright heart and pure,
Instruct me, for Thou know’st; Thou from the first		You were there in the beginning
Wast present, and, with mighty wings outspread,	20	Your wings were spread and
Dove-like sat’st brooding on the vast Abyss,		You were like a dove who turned
And mad’st it pregnant: what in me is dark		the darkness into light. And you can do the same for me.
Illumine, what is low raise and support;		I want to be enlightened where I am ignorant and I want to reinforce and strengthen my abilities
That, to the highth of this great argument,		So I can properly explain what has happened
I may assert Eternal Providence,	25
And justify the ways of God to men.		I want to explain God's great plan and purpose
Say first—for Heaven hides nothing from thy view,		Since you probably know everything about Heaven
Nor the deep tract of Hell—say first what cause		as well as what happens in Hell, I want to know...
Moved our grand Parents, in that happy state,		Why and how did Adam and Eve screw things up? I mean they must have been so happy in Eden
Favoured of Heaven so highly, to fall off	30	Heaven was really into them and gave them everything they needed
From their Creator, and transgress his will		from God, but they couldn't do ONE SMALL THING
For one restraint, lords of the World besides.		They only had one rule that they just had to follow
Who first seduced them to that foul revolt?		Who made them drop the ball? Of course I can't blame them, they just didn't know what they were doing!
The infernal Serpent; he it was whose guile,		It was that snake! He's quite the trickster
Stirred up with envy and revenge, deceived	35	He was driven by jealousy and revenge, and went after
The mother of mankind, what time his pride		our beloved Eve. That snake's blind pride
Had cast him out from Heaven, with all his host		got him kicked out of Heaven along with his entourage
Of rebel Angels, by whose aid, aspiring		of rebel Angels. Those Angels followed Satan
To set himself in glory above his peers,		and his blind ambition. Satan was able to convince them to support him in his quest to glorify himself above everyone,
He trusted to have equalled the Most High,	40	and even to the extent of waging war against Heaven
If he opposed, and, with ambitious aim
Against the throne and monarchy of God,
Raised impious war in Heaven and battle proud,		The inevitable result was war
With vain attempt. Him the Almighty Power		But Satan's quest for victory was already decided, and he was meant to fail.
Hurled headlong flaming from the ethereal sky,	45	He falls from grace
With hideous ruin and combustion, down		Ruined and on fire
To bottomless perdition, there to dwell		Down to his prison in Hell
In adamantine chains and penal fire,		Imprisoned in fire
Who durst defy the Omnipotent to arms.		Why bother fighting someone who already knows the outcome? Get better, Satan! Sit down and have a beer and stop complaining!
Nine times the space that measures day and night	50	Satan and his homies were lying defeated in Hell.
To mortal men, he, with his horrid crew,
Lay vanquished, rowling in the fiery gulf,		They were sore losers
Confounded, though immortal. But his doom		Confused, angry, and a multitude of other bad feels. Even though they can't really die, just living with these feelings sucked.
Reserved him to more wrath; for now the thought		This just made Satan even madder and bitter
Both of lost happiness and lasting pain	55	as he thought of all the pleasures he may never have and the never-ending pain
Torments him: round he throws his baleful eyes,		He looked at the Hell around him and he saw
That witnessed huge affliction and dismay,		All the suffering that his gang was going through,
Mixed with obdurate pride and steadfast hate.		But he was feeling even more hatred.
At once, as far as Angel’s ken, he views		Everywhere he looked
The dismal situation waste and wild.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Paradise Lost in Modern English

Book 1: Satan wakes up in Hell and rallies his fallen friends

THE ARGUMENT.—This First Book proposes, first in brief, the whole subject—Man’s disobedience, and the loss thereupon of Paradise, wherein he was placed: then touches the prime cause of his fall—the Serpent, or rather Satan in the Serpent; who, revolting from God, and drawing to his side many legions of Angels, was, by the command of God, driven out of Heaven, with all his crew, into the great Deep. Which action passed over, the Poem hastes into the midst of things; presenting Satan, with his Angels, now fallen into Hell—described here not in the Centre (for heaven and earth may be supposed as yet not made, certainly not yet accursed), but in a place of utter darkness, fitliest called Chaos. Here Satan, with his Angels lying on the burning lake, thunderstruck and astonished after a certain space recovers, as from confusion; calls up him who, next in order and dignity, lay by him: they confer of their miserable fall. Satan awakens all his legions, who lay till then in the same manner confounded. They rise: their numbers; array of battle; their chief leaders named, according to the idols known afterwards in Canaan and the countries adjoining. To these Satan directs his speech; comforts them with hope yet of regaining Heaven; but tells them, lastly, of a new world and new kind of creature to be created, according to an ancient prophecy, or report, in Heaven—for that Angels were long before this visible creation was the opinion of many ancient Fathers. To find out the truth of this prophecy, and what to determine thereon, he refers to a full council. What his associates thence attempt. Pandemonium, the palace of Satan, rises, suddenly built out of the Deep: the infernal Peers there sit in council.

tl;dr Now, this is a story, all about how our lives got twist-turned upside-down. Basically Satan and his gang were tossed out of Heaven for trying to engage in fisticuffs with Heaven. Satan wakes up and is like "Man, this kind of sucks but I'm gonna get Heaven back."